What is the Curse of the Self?
Human beings are unique in their ability to think consciously about themselves. Even our closest relatives, the chimpanzees, have only a rudimentary ability for self-relevant thought. Only because they have the capacity for self-reflection can people imagine themselves in the future, anticipate the consequences of their behavior, and plan for the future. Possessing a self also allows people to think consciously about who they are and what they are doing, take steps to improve themselves, and perform many other behaviors that are uniquely characteristic of human beings. The ability to self-reflect is essential for human life as we know it -- a fundamental aspect of being human.
Yet,
despite the obvious advantages of self-reflection, self-thought
comes at a very high price. Put simply, the ability to
think about ourselves
lies at the heart of many serious problems that people face.
The same mental apparatus that provides the numerous benefits of self- thought is also responsible for most of the personal and social difficulties
that human beings face as individuals and as a species.
Among other things, the capacity for self-awareness can:
- lead people to pay too little or too much attention to what they are doing and interfere with their ability to perform well in school, at work, in sports, and in bed.
- distort people’s perceptions of the world in egocentric and egoistic ways, leading them to draw inaccurate conclusions about themselves and other people, and prompting them to make bad decisions.
- conjure up a great deal of personal suffering in the form of depression, anxiety, anger, envy, and other negative emotions by leading people to ruminate about the past or imagine what might happen in the future.
- blind people to their own shortcomings.
- undermine relationships with others by making people egotistical and selfish.
- fuel social conflict, leading people to dislike those who are different from them and to fight with members of other groups.
- lead people to endanger their own well-being by pursuing egoistic goals over personal safety.
The same ability to self-reflect that makes us wonderfully different from other animals and that undergirds human civilization also creates havoc with people’s lives.
Most people realize from time to time that their self is a problem, such as when they can not stop dwelling on some past failure or future worry, conflicts with other people are fueled by the egos of those involved, or their mental chatter keeps them awake at night. However, few people realize how powerfully their lives are affected by their self-thoughts nor how frequently this inner chatter interferes with their success, pollutes their relationships with other people, and undermines their happiness.
Is Your Self A Curse? Click Here to Find Out